knee deep in weeds

notes on a simple life

river lessons

“I felt like a newly laid egg, all swishy and gloopy inside, and so fragile that the slightest pressure could break me.” 
― Gail Honeyman, Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine

the week is cantankerous and yet magical
i ricochet between confusion and certainty so often,
and so fast, i literally get dizzy. . .  
i find beauty and wonder in every corner,
but not always light

the weather is perfect from sunrise to late evening
we switch blankets on the bed, turn on the AC for a bit then
open the windows to allow the coolness
of our PNW nights to flow inside
we wake up chilled and i need my sweater
as i make my morning latte 

the flowers are at their peak and there are full vases in every room
the veggies start and we are overwhelmed with snow peas
and berries and i at least, eat both at every meal 

the dog and i walk in the coolness of the mornings
or head to the river, where he wades to cool off
i sit on the rock steps, leading down to the cold river and
watch the river and understand i am worn out from fighting the current
and yearn to just flow gently and with purpose in the direction i choose

“At the time I did not know that stories of life are often more like rivers than books.” 
― Norman Maclean, A River Runs Through It and Other Stories

i read somewhere that the sun gives flowers light, but what makes them grow
comes from within. . . i wonder if i have it left in me to allow grow from within, 
or if certain parts of my heart will always remain a tangled mess

i find this posted somewhere . . . 

I like cancelled plans. And empty bookstores. I like rainy days and thunderstorms. And coffee shops. I like messy beds and over-worn pajamas. But most of all I like the small joys that a simple life brings. - Unknown

i can't quiet bring myself to make my own list

not yet. . .