knee deep in weeds

notes on living a life


There is stunning beauty in mass randomness, in interlaced ideas and thoughts. 

There are pockets of light and clarity where confusion is tamed and a path forward often can be found. I am not surprised, as I haphazardly muck my way through the overload of information and goodness, that I often find myself tangled up and confused. What does surprise me is that I often find myself coming out the other end content and satisfied. 

But lately satisfaction is not what I yearn for. Slipping into a journey that is free of inquisitive questioning eventually becomes too comfortable. Old ways don't serve me as well as they use to and I feel it necessary now to be willing to step into the darkness some. Currently I feel the need to take my time and consider my next move instead of just aimlessly seeking a way out though whatever light might fall across the path. 

I have been pondering all of this with intention. Wondering how I might clear away some of this tangled mass and actually set out into life with a bit more purpose. I see how choosing a few tools that serve me well and using them, opposed to randomly grabbing on to the next best thing to come along, just might be key.  My life might benefit from a bit of pruning or unraveling, which will allow me to come into my existence with a bit more focus and clarity. I can't help but wonder what this might look like. 

I think what I recognize now is that there can be too much of a good thing. Unraveling is a slow process, identifying what feels right and what does not serve me, is hard. But I am showing up, full hearted, excited and a willing participant.