Baker

A dog can never tell you what she knows from the smells of the world, but you know, watching her, that you know almost nothing.

-Mary Oliver

He looks longly out the slider off our family room watching the deluge of rain fall from the sky. After a summer of being outside for most of the day, he is now stuck inside. Oh, we let him go out, but the smells are not the same and he runs amuck in the yard, pawing at the door after a few minutes wanting to be let back in. I dry him off and watch as he darts through the house running off energy only to soon curl up in his blanket on the couch to sleep. I fear come spring he might be a little chubby.

He looks at me as if this is my doing. I don’t tell him how much we need the rain after our long, hot, dry summer. I just get down to his level, give him some love, and take his photo.

openhearted

I watch as fall arrives in earnest, bringing with it the rain and the wind. I upgrade and downsize. Finding my myself overwhelmed at times, but also able to keep the intention in focus. I move slowly, paying attention, noticing, openhearted and assertive, knowing this is just where I need to be.

 

“I remember one morning...
getting up at dawn...
there was such a sense of possibility!
You know? That feeling?
And... and I remember thinking to myself:
'So this is the beginning of happiness...'
'This is where it starts!'
'And, of course, there'll always be more.'
Never occurred to me
it wasn't the beginning,
It was happiness.
It was the moment...”
― Virgínia Woolf

***

rain

“And in this moment, like a swift intake of breath, the rain came.”

― Truman Capote, Other Voices, Other Rooms

And it is glorious . . .

time to change

Now that she's back in the atmosphere
With drops of Jupiter in her hair
She acts like summer and walks like rain
Reminds me that there's a time to change
- Train ~ Drops of Jupiter

It has been a crazy few days, nothing too serious unless you are me. Let’s just say technology will be the end of me if I don’t simplify things. Somehow life today is harder than it was when I was a young mother with three busy boys at home, and a husband who traveled. So I start a list of things that eat up time and cause me anxiety and start crossing out those things which I can let go.

I already feel lighter.

a new autumn

“Autumn leaves don’t fall, they fly. They take their time and wander on this their only chance to soar.”

- Delia Owens, Where the Crawdads Sing

It is hard to find leaves that have actually turned on the trees from autumn weather. So many are dead and dried up, falling to the ground brown and cracked. We, the evergreen state, have not had any measurable rain since July 1st. We try to do our part, but I see now that it is not enough, we all have to do more.

dog love

Before the calm that comes at the end of most days, there is a bit of playtime for Baker. Sometimes he plays with Penny, the beagle next door. Sometimes he is content to sit on the lawn with a special chew toy. And some nights he is stuck with me. I am not as fun as the kids next door, or as tasty as his chew toys, but I do my best by throwing the ball or frisbee, or playing tug.

On this particular night however, I could not focus on anything but the sky and finally dropped his ball and grabbed my camera. I stood on our deck mesmerized, and watched this beautiful sunset unfold. And to my surprise he sat right there with me, waiting patiently for me to get done, just like he knew something beautiful was happening.

“What would the world be like without music or rivers or the green and tender grass? What would this world be like without dogs?”

― Mary Oliver, Dog Songs