a path of renewal

““You can measure your worth by your dedication to your path, not by your successes or failures.”

― Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear

I write here often about balance and abundance, about grief and joy, and the importance of slowing down. I write about how I try and listen to my emotions and my physical body and how I remind myself daily to take time to pause and pay homage and marvel at the world around me. I often do this with my camera.

It has dawned on me, just in the past few weeks, that when I started down this path of reawakening some 25 years ago (due to so many things out of my control) I expected to come out the other side cured, wiser, a bit daring, and self-assured. And I am not saying those things don’t happen occasionally, but for the most part I fight to stay on this healing path of renewal. It is not easy. It is not straightforward, nor is it effortless.

But, it is worth it.

“Anyhow, what else are you going to do with your time here on earth—not make things? Not do interesting stuff? Not follow your love and your curiosity?”

― Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear

this place, this hour

“Happiness, not in another place but this place...not for another hour, but this hour.”

― Walt Whitman

I pause throughout the days to notice autumn in all her beauty. I have afternoon coffee and savor the last cherry tomatoes from our CSA box. I sit on the floor for hours and act out Redwall with Percy, his stuffed animals taking on the roles of the characters within the chapters of the book. I sit across from him as we eat our lunch, and swap ideas about what we might do after we are done. I head to the lake in the early morning, twice in one week, to take in the dogs playing, and the moody atmosphere on the lake. I think about happiness, joy, grief, and regret, understanding how each play a part in this life of mine. But, I also comprehend clearly how I don’t have to reach far for abundance. For the bounty of a rich life is right here in this place and within this hour.

good company

“Keep good company, read good books, love good things and cultivate soul and body as faithfully as you can.”

- Louisa May Alcott 

There is a calmness that is slowly starting to awaken within me as I back away from the overwhelming need to keep busy. This is not an easy task, and there are times throughout the day that I sit idle and stew. But I keep at it, doing my best to fill my life with good company, letting go of outside influences and listening to my own voice.

backlight

“Light makes photography. Embrace light. Admire it. Love it. But above all, know light. Know it for all you are worth, and you will know the key to photography.”
– George Eastman

If someone were to ask me how I decide what to take photos of I would tell them I leave it up to the light - for I am a chaser of light. It is what draws me in as it illuminates what is begging to be studied, captured, and appreciated.

As I sat and watched these birds at our back yard feeder, the afternoon sun provided the best backlighting. I am holding on to these beautiful sunlit days as I know the rain is on its way.

awareness

“Look deep into nature and then you will understand everything better.”

— Albert Einstein

I can’t decide what I love more, the moodiness of a much needed rainy day, or the shadows and light of a day full of autumn crispness, sunshine and blue sky. Both are beautiful and worth noticing. Lately I have been out with my camera most days, trying to capture it all.